q & a.

Anyone who has known me for a while, will tell you...I'm a worrier.
I used to have this joke(?) that one of my best talents was worrying. Sadly,  it's kind of true. I'm really good at finding something to worry about.

But you know what is also true? God knows that I'm a worrier. He knows I am a planner. He knows what I need to hear, when I need to hear it.

This idea, that God knows me and knows what I need is where the title of this blog comes from:

Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? If then you are not able to do so small a thing as that, why do you worry about the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you--you of little  faith!
- Luke 12:24-28

Well, I just wanted to share some of the times that God has silenced my worry with His faithfulness. Even when I forget and get caught up in worry again, He patiently, lovingly reminds me of how He loves in His still small voice...

God, I graduated from high school, what am I supposed to do??

come to Portugal, meet these people, open your mind to a new way of life.

God, I am back in California, I'd rather be in Portugal. What am I supposed to do??

come to Fresno Pacific, meet these people,  open your mind to a new way of life. 

God, I have to pick a major. What am I supposed to do??

come to MBMSI, meet these people, open your mind to a new way of life. (it's okay that people don't think it's a practical major)

God, I am Biblical Studies major, I don't want to be a pastor. Do I have to go to seminary? . What am I supposed to do??

visit some seminaries, meet these people, open your mind to a new way of life. (it's okay not to go to seminary)

God, I still think about Portugal a lot. I need closure. What am I supposed to do??

come to portugal with this ticket that you can afford, reconnect with these people, open your mind to a new way of life. (you'll be coming back)

God, I know You're continually keeping Portugal on my heart for a reason but I have all of this student loan debt. What am I supposed to do??take this full time job.* and this check for half of your loans. learn skills to be used in the role I'm preparing you for in Portugal. 

*By the way...this is a really awesome story that is best, in my opinion, told in person. You should ask me about it sometime.

Sometimes it's difficult to hear the whisper of His voice among the noise of world and the voices of others. A whispered voice is best heard when you're close, When you're intimate.

Let's take some time to draw near to God this week. Just see what happens. :)

new. novo. nouveau. νέος.

I debated whether I should give into my compulsive darkside and start posting on this blog today and risk this being labeled as cliché and unoriginal ("New year, new blog...blah blah blah") or if I should/could/would be oh so daring and wait until tomorrow...

Obviously the darkside won this time.

Anyway, I just felt that I should have a more "grown-up" blog. I guess I've legally been a "grown-up" for several years now, but graduating from university and starting a full-time job (Praise the Lord x2!) had made me feel like it's a bit more official...or something. Hah, I'm still working on it but I figured it could be beneficial to share my thoughts, questions and experiences along the way.

So like I mentioned, I graduated from Fresno Pacific University with my B.A. in Biblical Studies in December. And to answer the most popular question, I'm not entirely sure what I am going to do with that degree. I can tell you that I absolutely loved the classes that challenged me to genuinely claim my faith--knowing both what I believed and why I believed it. I also feel like I have SO much left to learn, but I don't think that's too bad of a place to be. 


I also started working full time as an administrative assistant at a CPA firm. Can I just say, God is SO good! I not only got an interview for a job that had received around 500 hits (they posted it on Craigslist) but I was offered the job at the end of the interview, giving me a job BEFORE I had even graduated. Networking is key, y'all. 


My goal is to stay at home (saving $500-600 on rent and groceries) while I work and put as much money as possible towards paying off my student loans and be out of debt and preparing to go back to Massamá in five years. Not entirely sure how realistic that is yet, but I can't imagine staying here for a decade still in debt. I have been challenged to live out what I spent the last semester researching and writing about...living missionally every day, everywhere. The Espaço Vida Nova community is constantly on my mind, but the Church is here too and I am looking forward to engaging in the work God is doing in Fresno.


Okay, this is quite long...there are other thoughts I had to share, but I'll save them for another time. Sorry this isn't a cool traveling blog (at the moment) buuut you don't have to go anywhere to be a missionary. ;)




p.s. if you were wondering about the title of the blog...

"Has anyone by fussing before the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? If fussing can't even do that, why fuss at all? Walk into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They don't fuss with their appearance—but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them. If God gives such attention to the wildflowers, most of them never even seen, don't you think He'll attend to you, take pride in you, do His best for you? What I'm trying to do here is get you to relax, not be so preoccupied with getting so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep yourself in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Don't be afraid of missing out. You're my dearest friends! The Father wants to give you the very kingdom itself." - Luke 12:25-32 (The Message)